After one year, He finally gave me an answer. I had walked those two shepherds every morning at five in the morning for one year. He did not answer me once. Nothing, nada, zilch. But that one morning was different. He talks to me, but not the way you would think. It’s not a burning bush, an audible voice like we talk. It’s an awareness of a thought that I would have never thought of, as it had never been in my recollection to begin with. No, it was Him. Biola University. That’s it. At first, I thought, Loyola University. Yes, that’s close by. It makes sense. Biola. The thought continued. So, I finished my walk and went to the internet. La Mirada, California? What was I going to do there? I looked at the programs at Biola and there it was, screaming to me on the page: APOLOGETICS! What was I going to apologize to God for? No. It was from the Greek word meaning defense. This was a program in how to defend the tenets of Christianity. Sure, it made sense. A Master’s Degree?
Why not. What? Wait! Next day, I couldn’t wait to walk the dogs and bargain. One thing I found out about God. He doesn’t bargain. Biola. So, I’m a cardiologist and you want me to get a degree in apologetics at one of the most prestigious schools in apologetics in the country? I really don’t have time for this. I work eighty hours a week. My transcripts from two colleges, my medical school transcripts, so many years ago, I mean, really? Biola. I thought I was losing my mind. So, I proceeded to call the universities and medical school to amass all the documents and sent them to Biola. One and a half months later, on a Saturday (not Monday through Friday), I get a call: “Hi this is so and so from Biola University and would like to speak to Danielle Degarollami.” Yes, I’m Daniele De Girolami. “We would like to ask you one question?” Yes, I said. “Do you believe in evolution?” I said no. I believe God created everything. “Ok, we will get back to you. Thanks.” I stood there looking at my phone as if it had legs or something. One hour later, he called back! “Sir, you’ve been accepted into the Master’s program in Christian Apologetics at Biola University.” Dumbfounded, I sheepishly replied, you’re kidding, right? For real? “Yes sir.” I said thank you and hung up. Now, to tell you that I had an ah-ha moment would be a gross understatement. Wow, I thought. God was up to something.
Sure, I told everybody I could think of and many I never thought of that I was enrolled online at this program. Some thought; great, some; not so great. Anyway, when would I have the time to study? I had not planned ahead. Obviously. I never thought I’d get in. By the way, I did tell you; you just never bargain with God. So, some days later, a package came with all the essentials. Oh, my goodness, I hadn’t been a student in many, many years. Buying books, listening to lectures, writing papers; this was just more than I bargained for. Throughout this, I had a job to go to and a family to support. The juxtaposition of all of this made very strange bedfellows. Never mind you that it was God’s idea, not mine and well, I couldn’t just say no to God! Overwhelmed, hit me like a slap in the face. Determined, I went to the most important source I could think of: Amazon. I started a collection of books on Jesus that probably span over 700 by now. I was serious about this. And why? Well, you know.
Over the years, the courses got harder and harder. I just didn’t know what I didn’t know. The professors at this university were top notch. Two of the top 100 philosophers in the United States were from Biola. I took a few courses from one of them and my mind is still spinning to this very day. I delved deeper and deeper into the material. I read the Bible cover to cover and then again, an again. The Resurrection of Jesus, the Incarnation of Jesus, the Trinity, the existence of God, the inerrancy of Scripture; it was endless. Books and papers piled up into my computer. Thank God for Kindle and Word. Many nights, I thought that I was never going to finish. It’s too hard. I had to take trips to different states to listen to Evangelical Philosophical Society conferences. I ran the gamut from east to west. I spent days in motel rooms, alone, writing papers. Then, flying back home to see my wife, Sonja, for a moment only to get up the next morning and go back to work. Day after day, week after week, month after month, year after year (seven to be exact), I studied and studied, and studied.
Yes, I got great grades and learned a great deal. I made some great friends who loved the Lord just as much as I did. Most of them were around my age. Go figure! I must admit that through all of this, I didn’t think that I would ever be good enough to do it. Yes, I owe a great deal of gratitude to my sister, Liana. Yes, she proofread my papers like an editor from one of those high-powered publishing companies. She was tough, but insightful. I give her great thanks and a big hug. All in all, it was for a good cause, right? God asked me to do it, so I did. When I think back to all those years of going through it and all the thousands and thousands of pages read, the writing, the traveling, the stress, would I do it again? You know the answer. No bargaining. I remember in 2019, it was summer and I went to Los Angeles to the university to do some course work there for ten days. It was fantastic. Plus, got to spend some time with my daughter Adriana and her boyfriend, Nick. We hiked up Mount Allen one beautiful sunny day on Father’s Day. Perfect. Coming back home was hard as I don’t get a chance to see them very often but who knows what the future holds? Well, you guessed it. COVID-19! 2020. Like Dickens said: “It was the best of times; it was the worst of times.” My last year and I couldn’t even graduate at the school. My family was planning this great trip to Los Angeles to see me graduate. It wasn’t meant to be. There was a back and forth from the institution regarding the convocation but it just didn’t work out. Perhaps, in 2021, I could go to the commencement ceremonies with the summer graduating class, mask and all. Who knows?
December 18th, 2020. Graduation Day. It was Friday. A very busy day at the office. Then, I went to see my phone which I had set aside while doing a procedure. Flowers from my children in California. Beautiful. The day was coming to a close. Three more patients and I was free. Free to enjoy my graduation day with some cheese, crackers, and some carnitas. Yes, this graduation day was going out with a whimper or so I thought. See, one can never outsmart God. Just when you think He forgot about you; He show up in a big, unimaginable way. God is like that. You think He’s God. He’s too busy. He has other things to do. He doesn’t have time for me. He’s not personal. Then, He shows up! He’s big. Ineffable. That’s what happened.
After five months of being really sick, COVID-19 even, going through the motions of work, depressed, tired, weak, full of anxiety, and insomnia to boot, my final paper was drawing to a close. My day had come and all the years of hard work had paid off. I was done, did. Next. See, God has His plan. You make yours and I guess He laughs. What I didn’t expect was today. Today was my graduation. But the true graduation was waiting for me with the next patient. I had known her from the hospital. She was involved in cleaning in the hospital. She had come with her son. She told me of her pain in her legs and we planned for surgery. Then, as I was leaving out the door she said: “Doctor, my son doesn’t believe in God. Could you tell him of your testimony?” Sure, I said. I told him my testimony, how God came into my life 9 years ago. I explained many things to him, about how God was not a religion but a Person who wants a relationship with us. I spoke for about 45 minutes. After which, God showed me what all these years of study were really about. Her son, David, then asked: “Could you be my mentor? I want to know more.” I was stunned. I gave him my cell phone number and told him to call me anytime to talk. I left in wonderment of what God had taught me today on graduation day. Today, I was taught that it really isn’t about me. It’s about God and whom He loves, which is everybody! Today, this kid asked for a mentor, but there is a much greater Mentor: Jesus. Yes, today, God was my graduation present as He was present on my graduation day. Glorifying the One who chose me when I didn’t deserve anything from Him. That why, Biola. That’s why, all the years of struggle. That’s why the months of sickness. Pay attention and you might just catch a glimpse of how God works in your life. See, He doesn’t bargain, but how He gives love. Today, was graduation day from thinking about me to thinking about Him. Thanks, God.