Mirroring defined is the behavior in which a person unconsciously imitates the gestures, speech, or attitude of another. This is often seen in social situations particularly in contact with close friends or family. This is quite familiar to human beings, so familiar in fact that it often goes unnoticed. Mirroring seems to take on a life of its own as by some “passing of the baton,” the person assuming the gestures, speech and such, becomes a chameleon, similar to a “Talented Mr. Ripley.” We all do it. I’m convinced it’s generational as the effectual changes occurring as I get older are increasingly similar to my father’s idiosyncrasies. Lest one might think that it is purely generational, please be aware of yourself the next time you repeat the same phrases or the same gestures as your spouse or significant other, as it were. Moreover, the operative phrase is “unconscious behavior.” Seldom, does one capitulate to the obvious; you have become a mirror to someone else. And, when it finally becomes apparent, it oftentimes connotes a sense of pride or laughter, particularly if taken with a sense of humility and gratitude. Oftentimes, mirroring can be seen as an appreciation or a sign of love towards another. One longs to be “like” that person, but not in a begrudging sort of way, but in a sense of respect and familiarity. Like “The Call of the Wild,” mirroring could become dangerous, filled with raw emotions, mostly volatile in one’s nature as the mirrored behavior may overtake one’s personality so profoundly as if to denigrate such behavior into symbolism or worship, reminiscent of a fan. As with all things in life, some are good emotions, most are bad, I suspect, because human nature is ultimately doomed to repeat the same mistakes, over and over again. Another more dangerous aspect of mirroring lies in narcissism. One tends to take on the behavior to imitate oneself in gestures, speech, and attitude. How is this possible? Just look in the mirror. We do it every day when we shave, put on make-up, pluck eyebrows, nose hair, color hair, mustaches, and beards, put on clothes, et cetera. The list goes on forever. We are figments of our own imagination. We would like to be seen as we see ourselves in the mirror when we are at our best. The trouble is, is doesn’t last long and eventually, self-mirroring just doesn’t play out as we think it does. It you don’t think so, try wrinkles.
Mirroring becomes crucial in the life of a child. It becomes increasingly apparent that “bad” mirroring is destructive to a child while ”good” mirroring is necessary for emotional maturity. One becomes what one sees. Children are like sponges. They absorb every single move their parents make. From the very beginning of childhood, rearing is integrated with mirroring. The child “assumes” the behavior of the parent. This is critical in the formation of the child. Parents are often so busy in their own respective lives, they often forget that every gesture, every word, every attitude is ultimately imitated. Whether one chooses to accept this phenomenon or not, it happens in the formation of the child. They ultimately become exactly like their parents or the exact opposite. Seldom, is there an in-between state. Furthermore, it’s the responsibility of the parent to fully understand that their behaviors not only have consequence with their children, but ultimately who their children pick for a mate. The mirroring is reflected upon itself and repeated ad nauseam. Quite simple put, if you’re a jerk, your kids most likely will be jerks as well and, pick jerky friends and mates.
Mirroring can be inspirational. For example, one could take on the attributes of another musician, ball player, or Professor. This type of mirroring could be beneficial in the sense that for the greater good, one could mimic, or perhaps even surpass the person who is being mirrored. On the other hand, mirroring could be used as a weapon by the person mirrored, knowing that if others are mirroring the said individual, he/she could entrance one or many individuals for the sake of mass control and obedience. Gullibility is at the very forefront of mirroring. It’s inescapable. Someone must lead and others must follow. This becomes particularly troublesome when mirroring is targeted towards politics and religion. This is also evident in the media, the Hollywood elite, and people generally in the spotlight. Everyone wants to be someone else. To be fair, people of power and fame are typically mirrored, but this also readily occurs on the elementary, “soccer field,” middle-class America types, as well. So, the question should be asked, why mirror, at all? Is it inevitable? Do we succumb to ourselves because we think others have more merit than we do? Is it based on a valueless culture? Who decides? Who cares?
Perhaps mirroring is not exactly the proper forum for humans to interact with each other. Perhaps, to emulate is a better terminology when taken into its proper perspective. Some would ask, well, who would be someone that humans would emulate? There are many human beings that have come and gone which if one considered who to emulate, one might pick from a variety of lists of people that have influenced the world since the beginning. Obviously, there is a certain prejudice depending upon culture, socioeconomic, and geographical backgrounds. One could pick from many great examples but these would all fall short of the only Person who should not only be emulated or mirrored, but followed. Now, that’s a different word isn’t it? Not a fan, but a follower. A follower is different than someone one who should be emulated or mirrored. A follower demands action on the “playing field.” One can’t just sit “on the sidelines.” One commits. There is a sense of giving and humility. One serves. One gives. One obeys. Willingly, one becomes a participant in something greater than themselves. How does that come about? It’s not an act of volition. One doesn’t just simply decide to humble oneself for the sake of others despite who the others are and what they represent whether it be power, fame, glory, or poverty. Submission is the great act of the follower. One cannot see that in mirroring or emulation. Another attribute is forgiveness. In submission, the follower must forgive others who have mistreated them, not because of their worth, but because of the worth of Jesus. That is precisely what it means to follow Jesus. There are many fans of Jesus. There are few followers. One worships Jesus, not by mirroring or emulating, but by following. One can hopelessly mirror another, over even emulate them. What Jesus asks of us, in love, is to come and see; to follow Him. All He asks is to make a choice.